Demi Lovato's Dancing with the Devil: Learning to recover for yourself - Writing Wednesday
Hello everybody and welcome back to another blog post,
About a week or two ago, I began watching Demi Lovato's 4 part documentary, Dancing with the Devil. The documentary was about Demi Lovato's journey through to recovery and sobriety after she had relapsed on heroin back in 2018. It was certainly difficult to watch because I hate seeing people become controlled by their addiction, but at the same time, it was very insightful because it made me realise what was required for someone to overcome their drug addiction.
If you're not familiar Demi Lovato before, she is a 28 year old American pop-singer who became very famous at quite a young age through her appearances on Disney Channel and the release of her popular albums like Unbroken and Confident. I personally remember watching Demi on Disney Channel movies like Princess Protection Program and Camp Rock. I would say that around 7 or 8 years ago, she had already accrued a global audience and was seen as a huge role model amongst many of her fans. However, as the truth spilled over about Demi's drug issues in her first documentary, Simply Complicated, back in 2017, where she admitted she had a serious cocaine addiction during the time she was on Disney Channel, all of her fans slowly began to realise that Demi was quite unstable mentally. This was most likely due to the fact that she had so much pressure on her at such a young age to be this perfect role model that she knew that she wasn't always was. Although in Simply Complicated, it was said that Demi was getting better, Dancing with the Devil picks up from her most recent relapse, where, as the name of the documentary suggests, Demi was fighting for her life in hospital and was on the brink of death after she overdosed.
Dancing with the Devil revealed that Demi Lovato was hospitalised in July of 2018, after 6 years of sobriety. She began feeling an immense amount of pressure again, from her well-meaning fans, to be a role model and the figure head of recovery after addiction. In truth, Demi didn't see herself that way, partly because she had her own struggles that she dealt with as a child, growing up with a father who suffered from addiction, and also partly because Demi has always naturally seen herself as an ordinary person, despite her fame. I think this led to her feeling trapped and unauthentic which led to an increase in tensions, similar to what she had felt 6 years ago. To escape the reality, Demi began forming another secret relationship with another drug dealer in her area and one night, when all her friends left her house and she was on her own, she called her dealer to supply her with what she wanted at the time, which was heroin. She didn't expect it to have an impact on her body but she later realised that the heroin was combined with another, harsher chemical, that caused her to black out completely. When she woke up, she found herself in hospital with two tubes in her neck that were tenuously taking her blood, cleaning it from the toxins, and delivering it safely back into her body. People don't often realise how bad the relapse was. Demi had suffered temporary memory loss whilst she was inside hospital and still has blindspots in her vision.
This documentary has made me draw parallels to other stories that I've heard from drug addicts who have managed survive relapse by the skin of their teeth. A couple of months ago, me, my mum, and my sister watched a film that was based on a true story and it was called Beautiful Boy. It starred Steve Carell and Timothée Chalamet in it. It is a film that, if ever, you watch only once because it is not a nice film to watch at all. For me personally, the film served its purpose because it made me feel not only very distasteful of drugs and what it can do to the body, but it also made me feel very uncomfortable looking at how a smart student can just completely destroy themselves at such a young age. It's quite a long film that is worth watching in full but in short, this university student called Nicholas Sheff, starts experimenting with different types of drugs and becomes dangerously addicted to one of the most potent drugs, crystal meth. Although his father tries his best to help him, things become so out of control that in the end, he takes more than what his body is able to handle. A bit like Demi Lovato, Nicholas miraculously survived his overdose and in the end, he does completely turn his life around. However, what propels him to change is the fact that he wanted to and he knew that it was the right thing to do. In her first documentary, Simply Complicated, Demi was initially forced by her management to stop taking drugs. Her management was prepared to leave her if she didn't turn her life around, so in the end she changed and went through 6 years of sobriety, not because she really wanted to but because she was backed into a corner where she didn't believe that she had a choice. Personally, I think that that was what caused her to relapse because her issue was never fully resolved. She had to, like Nicholas, find it within herself to change because if she was the one who believed in becoming sober, she would no longer be tempted by anyone else around her. The future of all addicts is always going to be uncertain but 2 years later, despite the fact that Demi Lovato is still recovering, I think Demi has managed to find more of herself than she did when she first said that she was better.
Overcoming addiction, to put it lightly, is a challenge and it's not a cookie cutter. Especially when it comes down to potent drugs like crystal meth, it is scientifically proven that these drugs damage the nerve endings in your brain the more you take, so its not uncommon to see addicts become changed people. The other dangerous aspect of drugs is that once you start experimenting with these sorts of substances, you've already crossed the line because everyone's body reacts differently to these sorts of substances and you don't know for certain, what is in them so there's a high chance of people blacking out on their first try. Demi Lovato's relapse is probably a prime example of this. This is why it is so important that people begin to recover for themselves. If drugs have the power to be this controlling and this toxic, the desire for recovery has got to come from the addict, not anyone around them because it's only the addict who is able to break the shackles that restrain them. It's like with any addiction or even a general habbit, you have to find a way of making it click in your own mind in order to have a higher chance of overcoming it, otherwise one will always be at war with their addiction.
Dancing with the Devil is also the name of Demi's most recent song and it's quite painful to listen to. It's all about Demi's journey to recovery and the struggles she's had along the way. It's raw and unapologetic but at the same time, these stories shouldn't be anything but difficult to hear. Addiction is the symptom of a much larger, more serious issue and that is instability in mental health so recovering from an addiction is a very rocky path that is thwarted in more ways than none. The more one voices what they are going through, the more they begin to take back that power and control again. This song is difficult to hear but it's true and it needs to be heard because it truly communicates what she is going through.
TheEllenShow
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